Stunned with Bewildered Wonder

Have you ever tried naming the twelve disciples?  I can start off with Peter, Andrew, James, and John.  I remember Matthew, Thomas, and of course, Judas.  Those other five are harder to recall, and I will have to admit I had to grab my Bible and to come up with Thaddeus.  What a diverse bunch to put it mildly.  There is Peter who was bold and quick to act and speak.  Andrew was a seeker having been a disciple of John the Baptist before following Christ, and then introduced his brother Peter to Jesus.  Peter would become better known, but Andrew was content to be second.  James and John were also brothers, and were called the Sons of Thunder.  They were passionate and part of the inner circle.  These four were all fishermen by trade. Some scholars think Philip came from nobility and loved the scripture.  By nature he was pessimistic.  He wanted to help but did not see how it was possible, but He had a true heart for evangelism and the moment he received Jesus he went and found his friend Nathanael.  Nathanael had studied the Old Testament and had doubts about Jesus, but was open to correction.  Thomas could be discouraged and is remembered for his doubts.  Matthew was a hated tax collector wrapped up in himself and making money.  Simon was a zealot fiercely opposed to Roman rule and believed that whatever means necessary to defeat Rome was justified.  Very little is known about James the Lesser.  He was not known to be a mover and shaker.  Even though little is known about Thaddeus, his dream was that Jesus would dominant the world not be a suffering Savior. Thaddeus’ claim to fame seems to be that he was known by three names Jude, Thaddeus, and Lebbeus.  Judas was called and chosen by Jesus, but would betray Jesus.

Most resource books break the disciples down into three groups with Peter, Andrew, James, and John being the top group, and just as you would expect, Thaddeus finds himself in the bottom group, but the fact of the matter is, Jesus called and loved each one of them.   Everyone but Judas, grew in their love for Jesus to the point they were willing to die for their faith.  All but John is thought to have died a martyr’s death. For someone wanting to reach the entire world with their message, why would Jesus have chosen these twelve?  I was thinking about these twelve men, and how I can see a little bit of me in every one of them.  I sometimes speak before I think.  Sometimes I am pessimistic about God's promises.  Sometimes I get discouraged.  Sometimes I doubt.  Then I read this passage ...

Matthew 8 (AMP) 23 And after He got into the boat, His disciples followed Him.

    24And suddenly, behold, there arose a violent storm on the sea, so that the boat was being covered up by the waves; but He was sleeping.

    25And they went and awakened Him, saying, Lord, rescue and preserve us! We are perishing!

    26And He said to them, Why are you timid and afraid, O you of little faith? Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great and wonderful calm (a perfect peaceableness).

    27And the men were stunned with bewildered wonder and marveled, saying, What kind of Man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey Him!

A violent storm came up – remember that Peter, Andrew, James, and John were all fisherman - so storms on this sea were not something new to them.  The Word says that they all recognized that they were in danger of perishing and went to find Jesus.

That is where all of us begin our journey with Jesus.  We recognize that we are lost and dying in our sins and we need a Savior.  Jesus did not put them in groups of importance.  He had called them all and he loved them all.  With a word Jesus calmed the storm.  The Word then says they were all amazed.  Those considered by men to be the leaders did not think that they could have managed on their own.  They did not think they could have found a way to rescue themselves.  The disciples that have been categorized to be servants did not say they were not worthy and did not deserve to be rescued.  They all knew they were going to die and went to find Jesus.  Jesus loved them all and saved them all.

That simple message rings as true today as it did on that day on the Sea of Galilee.  We are all in danger of perishing spiritually and Jesus is our only hope.  The good news is He loves us, warts and all, and when we cry out to Him for help He will calm the storm within us. Even after we commit our lives to be disciples of Christ, that does not mean smooth sailing for the rest of our lives.   Just like the disciples, we all face many violent storms.  Some may be financial, some health related, or stormy relationships, but no matter what the storm, the answer is always the same.  Find Jesus!  You too will be stunned with bewildered wonder and marvel.

P.O.E.T.R.Y.

Will You Be Mine?

Valentine, you make me silly;

You make my heart beat willy-nilly;

When I'm with you, the world is hazy;

Valentine, you drive me crazy!

Valentine, when we're apart,

My need for you goes off the chart.

Will you be mine? Can I be thine?

Say you'll be my Valentine!

                                           By Joanna Fuchs

Valentine's Day was Tuesday and there was a lot of poetry written, quoted, and read.  For all of us who are not gifted poets, we turned to Hallmark to say it for us.  I will have to confess I am not a poetry fan.  I find it difficult to follow, difficult to understand, and way too much work for 5 stanzas.  That is why when I read this paragraph in Dancing to the Heartbeat of Redemption by Joy Sawyer I was flabbergasted.

“God chose to tell his story and the story of his people’s lives largely through poetry.  Nearly two-thirds of the Bible is written in some poetic form of the Hebrew and Greek languages:  the Psalms, Proverbs, Song of Solomon, Lamentations, and the books of the Prophets, Revelation.  Even the highly structured, stringent laws and regulations of Leviticus contain poetry.”

Nearly two-thirds of the Bible is written in poetic form.  I am not sure of the accuracy of the number two-thirds.  Some sources say a lot and one source said one-third.  Regardless of the specific number, they all agree that there is a large portion of the Bible that is poetry.  I tried to dismiss the statement and move on, but I just could not get the idea out of my head that maybe I was missing out on a deeper relationship with Jesus by searching the Bible for knowledge, answers to life questions, for a moral compass, a path to encounter Christ, and on some level to fulfill a spiritual discipline, but never as poetry.  Didn’t I just say I wasn’t a poetry fan?!  I don’t know that I ever have sat down to read my Bible as a poet looking to discover love and be overcome with the emotion of what I have read. Poetry is meant to arouse emotions, and for the most part, that is something I have tried to avoid.

I will have to say that learning to read poetry is like learning a foreign language.  It feels awkward, frustrating, and painfully slow.   I definitely needed some help so I hopped on Google and landed on www.shmoop.com.

The first piece of advice was to follow my ears.  It has been my experience in the past that I do not have a good ear for learning foreign languages, so who knows where following my ears for poetry might lead me.  The next suggestion was to read with my heart and not my mind listening for the rhythm of the words. They suggest I do this while reading out loud.  This already is getting weird for me.  As I sit down with the word of God, I am to read slowly and not skip one word so that each word adds something to the overall experience of the verse.  I will never make it through the Bible in one year at this pace.  For me it is much easier to read a verse and then write out how it applies to my life.  Does it instruct me how to live a holy life, point out sin that needs confessed, encourage me, challenge me, but how does it make me feel has never been on that list.  

One of the reasons that so much of the Bible was written in poetic form is that it aids in memorization.  The Word of God is meant to dwell within us and change us from the inside out.  Once again I am faced with the idea that God desires transformation not my ability to recite spiritual laws. 

Another point on this web site is that I read in crazy places like on the subway, on a mountaintop, or on a beach.  They suggest that a change of scenery can effect how the words reverberate through my soul.   I pretty much have my Bible reading time and place set. There aren’t any subways, mountains, or beaches anywhere close by, but I might get really crazy and try reading in a park, or sitting by a lake, or outside on a bench watching the sun go down.  I wonder what it would feel like to read about the night of Christ's betrayal outside late at night? 

One last thing I want to mention is the idea that I am to think like a poet.  Are you kidding me??  Me a poet!?!?!? I am a conservative, practical, straight as the cornrows, Iowa girl.  My poetic past pretty much consists of Roses are red and Violets are blue, but they want me to take one of David’s poems and read one line and then step into the poet’s role and come up with the next line.  What would my next line to, "the Lord is my shepherd,” have been?  David had options so why did he say, “I shall not want?” and how do I think David felt when he said that and how does it make me feel.  Oy vey!

Learning something new is never easy and the beginning step is always the hardest.  One of my favorite quotes is:

“One does not discover New Lands without consenting to lose sight of the Shore for a Very Long time.”  Andre Gide

Reading the Bible as a poet is going to take me far from the safety and comfort of the shore I have known.  I really hope all of you will come with me so we can share our discoveries.  I am setting sail to become a poet and a lover of poetry.  Maybe I am really a poet and just didn’t know it- we’ll see. 

How I got here:

The Fire of the Word by Chris Webb

Dancing to the Heartbeat of Redemption by Joy Sawyer

Song of Solomon

 www.shmoop.com

www.ehow.com/how_2113188_read-poetry.html

Go Tell My Story

When our daughter was little, every night at bedtime she wanted to hear a story.  Sometimes a silly, quick, made-up story would suffice, but most nights she would pick three books from her favorites to have read to her before she would fall asleep.  One of her all-time favorites was Willy Bear. 

Willy Bear seemed to find his way into the favored three-book pile almost every night. After a while, I would put Willy Bear at the bottom of the pile hoping she would fall asleep before I had to read it one more time.  I would try to skip pages, but nothing doing.  I would try to just leave out a word here and there, but I was caught and corrected every time.  She loved the story of Willy Bear and had memorized the entire book and there would be nothing left out.  Every page, and every word on every page, would be read.

Of course all good stories have the basic ingredients of theme, plot, structure, characters, and setting.  The greatest story every written, ever told, or ever heard is His Story.  It is the story of our redemption.  The theme of redeeming love runs from beginning to end.  The plot has moments of heart wrenching sadness and then literal death defying grandeur.  Instead of opening with, “Once upon a time,” His Story begins with, “In the beginning God” and never comes to “The End.” From the first pages we are drawn into this love story.  It is evident that the story is not just about a man and a woman, but about every man and every woman.  It is about God’s search for me. 

We watch as God creates mankind for communion.  The moment of conflict comes when the ones created to receive His love betray Him through disobedience.  But He is not willing to let them go and so the most amazing plan of all time is set into motion to redeem them.  It will not be quick and it will not be easy, but He will not be denied the love of His life.  It becomes obvious that if those He loves are to be redeemed, someone must pay the price with their life.  But who?  Who would be willing to give their life?  It is almost as if you can hear the horrified gasp of angels as the proclamation is made that God’s only son will go and be the willing sacrifice.  And so the Son leaves His Father, He leaves His kingdom; He leaves His authority, and goes to those who have been separated from this great love.  He is misunderstood, rejected, betrayed, and then the very ones He loves sentence Him to death.  He would go through extreme agony for love’s sake.  He would endure gross humiliation for love’s sake.  And then He would die for love’s sake, but His love would not be denied. He would rise from the dead and restore the way that had been severed through disobedience.  Once again the heartbeat of love could be heard.  This story was never meant to be heard by only a few; it is meant to be heard by everyone.

Mark 16:15  (KJV)  And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.

My paraphrase would be, “Go tell my love story.”  So how do we tell His Story?

What Makes a Good Story? by Chris King

“A good story is a story that you love and love to tell. Never, never, never, tell a story you don’t like, even if a client has requested it. As a storyteller, we are never on the outside looking in as we tell the story. We are a part of the story. We have internalized that story and we truly care about it. We can’t do that, if we don’t like the story.”

 I have to ask myself if my love for this great love story has grown cold.  I ask myself why my heart does not crave to hear it again and again?  Why do I not desire do read every page and every word on every page.  How can I skip whole chapters, leave out words with no remorse?  If my love for His Story has lost its fervor, then my telling of the story becomes boring, routine, and lackluster. 

I pray that my love for His story will be rekindled and telling His story will be my passion.  I pray that I will never tell His story as an outsider or as an onlooker but that the telling of His story will come from a heart that has been captured by His love.  I pray that this story be a part of the very fiber of who I am and that I will love God with all that is within me.  This Valentine’s Day there are many who crave for someone to love them.  Tell them His story from a heart that is ablaze.

Loved

                                           

I have been unfaithful

I have been unworthy

I have been unrighteous

And I have been unmerciful

I have been unreachable

I have been unteachable

I have been unwilling

And I have been undesirable

And sometimes I have been unwise

I've been undone by what I'm unsure of

But because of You and all that You went through

I know that I have never been unloved

I have been unbroken

I have been unmended

I have been uneasy

And I've been unapproachable

[cs from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/michael_w_smith/never_been_unloved_bruces_so.html ]

I've been unemotional

I've been unexceptional

I've been undecided

And I have been unqualified

Unaware I have been unfair

I've been unfit for blessings from above

But even I can see the sacrifice You made for me

To show that I have never been unloved

 It's because of You and all that You went through

I know that I have never been unloved

I have been unfaithful

But I have never been unloved

Never been unloved

Never been unloved

Michael W. Smith